Well, last Thursday I was sick with the worst stomach pains I've ever had in my whole entire Peruvian life. So I stayed home and watched Harry Potters 1 and 2. What joy! I got so excited that I read Harry Potter 1 that day, and now, one week later, I'm finishing up Harry Potter 5. My obsession is complete and full. I invite all able minded and bodied humans everywhere to do the same in preparation for Harry Potter 3 (to be released in less than a month). So in order to become one with the magic, this poem will be slightly different. I have put no prethought into it, and instead will write whatever magical thought comes into my head. (Don't expect too much rhyming.)
Harry, this one is for you...
Splendid Magic Cream Stick
Days of darkness, and fear spreads o'er the land.
Evil unchecked, worse by ten than Anger CanMan.
Outnumbered, those few brave souls still fight on.
No hope of survival, just denial of what's wrong.
Then bursts forth like a well prepared pimple
a ray of hope to the weak and the simple.
Rare power unknown banishing evil, BEGONE!
Little Harry Potter gets his stop the Dark Wizard on.
Now at the school of witchcarft and wizardry,
poor little Harry has begun to hit puberty.
Emotions and hormones run wild in fits,
the magic of manhood will very soon hit.
Growing and learning and constantly yearning,
for answers to the past, and to why his scar is burning.
If you're feeling the love, come on raise up your fists!
My man Harry is tha master quidditchologist.
Mean teachers, dark wizards, the poor kid never gets a break.
He better get some Cho lovin in book 6 for Pete's sake.
Oh Harry, just a warning, you might want to stay away,
From that Colin Creevey boy who's always following you (I think that he's gay).
Now the Dark Lord has returned and's all hype on his game.
Straight up fixin fo' blastin some peoples away.
And our only hope for survival again it would seem,
is NOT a large fish, or even my spleen...
It's Harry Potter.
That's the end of the poem, but for reals Harry, you know I got your back... I love you man. And I want to give some shouts out to GrandMaster Bling AKA Albus Dumbledore; Hedwig and her crew; my man Hagrid, thanks for all the shoes; Ron, Hermione, Weasleys, Y'all got it goin' on... 'specially you Hermione... girl you definitely got it goin' on. Peace.