Monday, December 15, 2008

Global Warming Is A Devious Trickster...

Fact: it is snowing in Vegas. Fact: it has been snowing for the past few hours in Vegas and I am sitting at my desk, with my blinds pulled up so I can clearly view the snow falling outside, one beautiful, large flake after the other. Indisputable Fact: Global Warming is real, because not only did Al Gore (a bastion of knowledge in our ever-heating world) make an excellent film that says so; not only are the lame and stupid scientists that dispute it snickered at (and called clever names like "flat-Earthers"--get it? Like they would have been the ones that believed the earth was flat when far smarter guys were totally right about it being round) by the other real, and far more awesome scientists who don't like their guesses and predictions for the future questioned; but also it has been summarily proven that the mere act of denying mankind's involvement as the source of global warming and climate change is akin to denying the Holocaust.

Thank you science and agenda-free journalism for clearing that one up. In other news it has been snowing here in Vegas for the past few hours and it is lovely. Somehow while Earth has been steadily growing warmer over the past 100 years (we'll brush that period of time under the rug, when, a few decades back, science told us that we had to fear global cooling and maybe even another another ice age! Yikes! I'm glad science was wrong then...), Vegas has received snow three of the past 5 years. This is obviously one of Global Warming's tricks, designed to lull us into a false sense of security, thinking that it doesn't exist so that it can administer its poison to us slowly and stealthily. Don't be surprised to see Earth go through some cooling periods (like the one we have been in since 2001 or so) as Global Warming pretends to not exist. It is real, or the Holocaust didn't happen. Infallible logic.